guys alert!! - vday coming..jeng jeng jeng

alert alert alert!! valentines day is coming to town.. hmm, so guys.. are u ready for one of the biggest day of ur life? cam kene bagi present la apela..hmm, so lets see.. im not a cupid but maybe i can help some of u guys that dont have a damn idea what to do or give to ur girlfriends. wait a minute, i just posted a few minutes ago n i manage to post again?? haaa, tuh bile ayen dah byk ngat bende nak ckp and he is damn bored..ok guys.. get ready with ur pens and paper and i guarantee my guide will make ur love blossom..cheeewaaahhhh!!!

valentines day usually is nothing for guys, but for girls.. they take it seriously.. vday is on par with their birthdays, their annivesaries, hmm.. the day that their enemy(im sure girls ade their personal enemy yg tibe2 die benci..) got scolded or malu di khayalak ramai cam tegolek bile pakai heels..hmm, its special for them..as boyfriends we got to make it special too..

for me, its not about having a super expensive dinner sumewhere in paris or going to a desert with ur girlfirends..not about having hot sex on top of ur roof or in the toilet or even having movies in the goldclass cinema that will cost u 60bucks for two person..hahaha, its not about buying mega gifts but for girls, all those stupid teddy bears, chocolates and cards..i think they want something special that is surprising.. yup, its bold.. girls love surprises.. xcayer g tanyer, hehe..dun worry, eventually u got to trust me on this.. guys always think about money.. they see that big presents make their girl love u more..buzzz!! ur damn WRONG!! its not about the money and value but remember, vday is about romance and surprises.. S-U-R-P-R-I-S-E-S.. said it with me guys.. i know most of the guys always want to have the perfect valentines day, so here are a few tips from me..(if u dun want to follow, suke hati..hahahaha)

1. MAKE ur own card
this is so damn simple and most of the women will love it.. make it as cute as possible.. show a little effort, carrylah ur lazy bums sket..be ready with paper, glue, scissors, pens and whatsoever..if u dun have it, just steal it from ur younger sibs or curik la sumwhere..instead of spending a few bucks on a huge card from memory lane or hallmark that were created by some bunch of asses who dont even know ur gf n u or even ur relationship, better make one ur own.

just draw funny stuffs.. like a heart with u and her inside it ..or kat luar ke.. i know u guys are creative.. xpayah nak poyo2 print ke ape..make it look crude..i think so.. the cruder it is..the cuter it is, more likely ull get hot sex that nite..hahaha..anyway, girls dun care how the card looks like, its the effort that counts.. 1 star for bariong there..

2. pretend to be gay and make a photo album
im not sure bout this but woman do love photos.. if u guys remembered a scene from bruce almighty where the jackass jim carrey made the album, even aniston's friend became quite emotional that time.. hmm, so voila..photo album coming up!! get a nice photo album from anywhere.. not from the kodak shop please..get 1 from jusco or ikea or anywhere according to ur budget and cut thos pictures and make a nice album with captions.. if u think ur kinky enough, at those blank spaces, just put captions like - my first anal experience..hahaha, or my first blow from my dearie..huhuhu, it adds spice..who known man??!!! i have no evidence on this..but if u wanna try it..hahaha

3. make her dinner
a fuckin easy one to be done. a lot of guys start to collect hundreds and hundreds of quids to go and dine at a very exclusive place.. make dinner for ur girl. easy as that. u do not need to prepare super difficult dishes like ayam gulai lemak cili api, lala masak asam pedas with terung sambal petai..or even tomato concassé or saffron infused sea bass..huhu, just to name a few..(what the f**k is that - i dun have a damn idea)..the simple rules are just to make something that u like, something easy, and of course something that u know how to prepare, duhhh.. kalo nak gempak, just type google.com and search for anything..moreover, take taste into consideration k? dun just blasah and wallap everything suddenly rase cam cipan goreng.. but trust me, ur girl will say it taste good..knape?haa. lesson number 1 - effort and surprise.. hehehe.. anyway, jgnla masak sosej if ur girl is kuat agame and thinks that sosej is haram or even dun try to cook burgers if ur girlfriends are vegeterians..be more sensible and think like a man..wahahahaha.. think like a man, habedah a..dpt cucur mebon jela gamaknyer.. so make her dinner.. and prepare a nice table with candles and maybe insense(how to spell also i dunno)..yepp..

4.holidays
when u get a little more money, take ur girl out to a nice holiday somewhere.. its nice to double or triple dates with others.. it will increase the excitement.. trust me - not on bed (never tried it before,hehe) but the dinners and lepak2 burak2 and all.. reminder, holidays are not suppose to be on a perfect day.. just surprise her suddenly like.."dear, ive already booked a place in langkawi bla2.. i hope ur free on bla2.. dah ajak bla2.. nak ajak sape2 g??"haa..just like that..surely she'll be excited until the day comes and ur lovelife will be so fucking better..but this type of thing only can be done to the couples dat have came thru something like "been there, done that" kinda relationship..or super rapat and rilekerz.. remember k? the holidays shud be on the 5th of march, 8th of august, or whenever u like..hehehe

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only 4 lah, lain mmg i keep it to myself..rahsie woo..huhu.. nolah, just kiddin.. if u guys have other interesting and cool ones, just add lah at the comments.. anyway, trust me this kinda thing will work and it will make ur girl very very very very very happy with the amount of effort u have gone into ( except if the girl ur dating is some cold hard bitch and u dun have a choice - last resort oang kate.. maybe u shud find a gay or sth..hahaha.. or be single!!)

happy valentines day for everyone!!!!

-babi ape aku tulis ni..memalukan..chiss!!!!-